The Main Character Chord Willwood

Capo 0 with [C] [Am] [E] [F] [A] [G] [Fm] [Dm] [A#m]


VERSE
I’m the first-person they talk about in all the books
I’m the perspective you can not doubt, see how I look
Control the narrative reliably, baby, it’s all about me
And I wrote the book about throwing the book at those who don’t do it by it

PRE-CHORUS
So now I’m holding myself hostage Stockholm lust just looks for justice
And enough lefts don’t make the right but two wrongs
Do, oh man, Sun Tzu would love this
Beating my dead high horse off the high road to low ground
‘Cause if you shake your fists at snakes in grass it looks like punching down!

CHORUS
So God forbid I’m seen just as an average human being
I mean, imagine if protagonists just died in the first scene
I’m the gap between a tragedy and comedy
Don’t come at me, I’m the main character and you have to like me

SOLO

VERSE
I loot plot armor from NPC’s, well, they are to me
Trite, tropes, traits, traumas, trinkets, and treats; it’s all XP
Look in the sky, it’s a bird! It’s a plane!
No, it’s super-ego! The underdog you cheer for
Villains are everywhere, that’s how I know that I’m the hero

PRE-CHORUS
So tie me to the train tracks, laugh and snidely twist your mustache
Snidely Whiplash, Boris Badinov, ignorin’ me’s bad enough
Where do you get off? Da, dasvidaniya, darling, Daleks in high collars
Monologue and I outsmart them with a ray-gun and a tweet

CHORUS
So God forbid I’m seen just as an average human being
I mean, imagine if protagonists just died in the first scene
I’m the gap between a tragedy and comedy
Don’t come at me, I’m the main character and you have to like me

SOLO


PRE-CHORUS
Judge me by what my cover shows, author becomes beyond reproach
You don’t know the prose, or if the spine is still intact
Oh, like Alice fell to wonderland come Astroturf my Overton
And bolden my demand to live by alternative facts

BRIDGE
Her majesty says “the royal we demand a standard of loyalty
An agreement to be reverent, lick the emperor’s new boots”
The court fool got the guillotine, the witches the stake, you the dopamine
And Siemens made the Zyklon B but we all still get the flu
We all do what we need to to get through. (It’s nothing new)
But I ain’t done one fcking thing to you!

OUTRO
So God forbid I’m seen just as an average human being
I mean, imagine if antagonists lacked any evil scheme
And I’m the gap between a tragedy and comedy
Don’t come at me, I’m the main character and you have to like me